Saturday, January 28, 2012

Now that i am here...

Now that i am here and have actually seen Her,
a knowing that Nothing actually needs saying,
or more accurately The Saying is done without words.
i sat in the hospital room with my wife and daughter,
visiting our lifelong friend who was lying there in bed.
Not thinking about her/my past of excellent sharing and good feelings.
i didn't think to thank her for bringing Noel into our life.
They were such a good match.
Like two aliens from a planet of benevolence, they parented the world.
i didn't thank her for the sense of adventure she imparted to my wife.
The funeral services for dead birds, contributing to vegetarian-ism.
i sat there, just sat there feeling, feeling something maybe gratitude,
though if it is gratitude it is not directed, it is not For anything.
Maybe love, but not love For or By or With, just Love.
But i don't know what Love is either.
Appreciation could get a look in,
but that implies appreciation for Something, and there's no Thing here.
Ah, there's just a Warm something in the region of the Solar Plexus.
A Feeling that might touch lightly on all of the Above, just a Feeling.
Solid in the Centre and Softening as it radiates outward,
To infinity, though i feel its' intensity for a just a few metres.
It's Her.
It's She who is that Feeling.
It's Heather inside me, that part of me that's permeated with Compassion.
But it's Her Compassion for everybody that's inside my chest.
Oh well, if i say it is love,
You'll think you know what i mean.