Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Ask yourself what you really hate in people you see as vulnerable or weak.

Ask yourself what you really hate in people you see as vulnerable or weak.
Eric Gross - Liberation from the Lie

Hmm, vulnerable people are not hateful. Unless i hate the sadness and desire to 'fix' things that wells up in me. i certainly hate some of the destructive behavior some vulnerable people exhibit.
i feel extremely uncomfortable (sometimes frightened) around drunk people. 
Once you have settled on what vulnerable type you really can't stand, write down the specific content of this visceral contempt image to really nail it down. 

Drunk women were (are?) embarrassing. When i was a child my mum used to embarrass me by calling attention to herself and insisting that i dance with her. It always ended with her having a fight with her sister or mother.
Drunk blokes frighten me. (at least they used to. It hasn't been tested in a long time) They bring intense emotion to anger and violence. They do stupid things that often ends up in someone being hurt. i don't like Pubs. 
Then consider the following: The vulnerable type you hate the most is the personification of your Wound.
Hmm, it's the 'out of control' aspect in common to both gender drunks.
consider what they really can't stand about adult members of their same gender. Thoroughly immerse yourself in what you hate about others. The details of this contempt should give you a clear understanding of your personal Wound.

The games drunk people play. The mutual (ego) masturbation present when a group of blokes gather at the pub on the one hand is an excellent display of mateship and connection, except that there really isn't any connection. Each is just reinforcing his story. i guess that is why they are mates.
concentrate on what you hate, but this time consider what you despise about those who are powerful.

The lack of compassion.
The powerful people you hate are mirrors of your original invalidators.

This one is easy. i despised the lack of compassion in my father as a powerless child. All adults had an unreasonable amount of power over kids (then) but he enforced his demands with the razor strop when i was young and the iron (power) chord when i reached adolescence.

i feel i have changed significantly in the past couple of months, so all of the above needs re-testing.